Posted on November 21 2018
It’s Thanksgiving and I’m trying to figure out why we all kill ourselves to give thanks on this one day. No, I’m not messing with you. I’m really questioning it. Have you ever stopped and wondered why we all gather with family and friends, some we don’t even like... let’s be honest here, and work tirelessly to make a meal that is consumed far more quickly than anyone would care to admit, to give thanks. Sure, I think we all take a moment to express what we’re thankful for, maybe we all go around the table and say a little something, but it feels fast fleeting. Everyone hits pause for a brief moment, but really they’re already thinking about the doing the dishes and it’s onto the next holiday. Then there’s the pre Thanksgiving and post Thanksgiving commentary. The recap is seldom uneventful and has you questioning why we gather, or worse yet, vowing NOT to do it again next year. My questions are why only one day out of the year and why this way... with a meal? Why can’t we do this more than once a year? Can we do it quarterly? Can we gather with people that genuinely want to gather together and sincerely give thanks while having heavy hor’dourves? Why do we have to eat turkey? Is it wrong to tell you I don’t like turkey? On a sandwich, yes, but a Thanksgiving turkey? Nope. I don’t.
I know, I’ve got you really miffed right now and I am too because I’m really thankful for so much, but it gets overshadowed by so much B.S. that really doesn’t matter. What I’ve found over the years that it’s okay to opt out or scale back and try to maintain realistic expectations about how everyone will behave. After all, let’s not forget that you’ve known most of these people since you were born. There are patterns of behavior that are beyond your control. The only thing you have control over is your exposure and reaction to the behavior. Say, for example, you have a tit starer “uncle.” This is the guy you grew up calling “uncle” even though you’re not related to him at all. Do you really think he’s going to do anything other than stare at your tits, if you’ve got them? It’s predictable, so you throw on a baggy sweater or loose fitting turtleneck and give him less to stare at. I know what you’re thinking... why should I have to plan my outfit selection based on his bad behavior? You’re so right, but “Uncle Jimmy” isn’t going to change for you or anyone else. What do you do? You wear the baggy sweater and dodge “Uncle Jimmy” all night long.
I guess I should stop and point out I really do love some aspects of Thanksgiving. I love to gather with my family. I do love to cook and bake. I love to host and set a pretty table, hence all the pretty tablescapes by Casa de Perrin. Most importantly, I love to give thanks. So, there’s my rant. I am confident we will continue to kill ourselves year after year and teach the next generation to do the same unless they’ve got a better idea. My gut instinct tells me Oona, Neve, Iona, and Vendela will absolutely come up with something better and I can’t wait to see what it is!
p.s.- We don’t have an “Uncle Jimmy” in our family. Sorry, if you do... I feel for you!